I once had a girl I was pursuing say, “I’m just not looking for a relationship right now.”
Fair enough. I took it for face value, just bad timing and “such is life…” kinda thing. But then several days later, I hear my co-workers talk about how she was hanging all over the local university’s star tennis import out at the club.
Wait, what the what…?
Were they sure this was the same girl? How could this be? Did she lie to me!?!
…and then she was dating him, and then she ended up in a long term relationship with him.
So as a logical human being, there’s a tendency for some head scratching in this scenario. She said one thing, but she did another.
No wonder women seem so confusing!
First, you need to always look at a person’s actions over their words. Over the years humans have developed their own special avoidance language known as “double talk.” Women use double talk partly because they don’t completely understand what compels them to feel a certain way, but also because they’ve had to out maneuver men and their fragile egos for thousands of years.
It’s as much our fault as men, by the way, as most of us don’t act like men with rejection, and either beg, pout, berate, or much worse sεχually assault, instead of just saying “Nice to meet you” and moving on to the next chance at romance.
If you’re a man that has dated or been in relationships, you have probably heard at least several of the following double talk phrases (I’ve heard 7!). All of which mean you’re getting rejected. Since it’s my job to protect your heart and cut through the noise, I’ll translate with a bit of tough love: